Entry #15 – November 29 2007
I smoked again

Bad News, I smoked again today. In fact I am still a little stoned. I won’t be smoking Friday – Sunday as I have friends in town, so this should be a great way to get a couple of days under my belt.   Regardless I am not going to give up.  I am going to learn How to Quit Smoking Pot!

I will not be going out to any party spots or pubs next week. Every relapse I have had involves the party crowd and the pubs near my house. I know that if I stay away from them, I will have a much better week. I have been eating a lot better and my energy level has been improving despite the slip ups I have made this week. I finally finished my Why I Quit article. I keep reading this for motivation. One commentator, Cholo-Barco, has had some great insight on other reasons to quit. I will definitely be exploring and writing more about his ideas.

I am still fighting a sore throat, with a mild fever and headache. Weed is the wrong medicine for this type of sickness!

Days Sober 0

Entry #16 – November 30 2007
My Marijuana Abuse Continues

I have to keep this entry short as I have friends visiting.  I worked hard and kept very busy today.  I feel like my head is clearing up and it is getting easier to focus for short periods of time.  I still have a cold and sore throat, so feel slightly under the weather.     Each day I am sober, things will get cleared and brighter.    I am going to spend more time reading, learning, and maybe even blogging!

But I smoked today as well.   I got a little bit last night and smoked this evening while I cleaned, and before my friends arrived.  It felt great, no burnout, my head was clear for the rest of the night.   What a horrible thing.      Before I wrote this, I didn’t feel bad about it, but now that I see it on the page, it is really upsetting.  WTF am I doing if I want to quit that badly.   I can’t smoke just a little….its the addict in me.   I will dispose of the rest of the pot I have left. About $20 worth.  Sober Tomorrow!

Days Sober: 0

I have put a lot of time into this blog in the last week.  It is up and running now and developing nicely, even though the poll is still messed up.   Next week I promised myself not to drink or smoke.  It will be easier not to smoke if I am not in a drinking environment.   I will also not be exposed to as many regular smokers, thus will be able to avoid that temptation.  I am going to have to develop some resistance to social pressures, and will spend part of the next week investigating how.

Happy Weekend Everyone.

Entry #17 – December 1 2007
Journal Day 10

Went out late tonight to watch a movie, so I’ll keep it brief. Friends are still visiting and we are having a great time. We all smoked tonight before going to a movie, so I didn’t make it through today either. Old habits die hard. I still have a tiny bit left, so we will all finish it tommorow so that I can make a clean entrance into the work week. I didn’t throw out my rolling papers and box last time. I am going to throw away all of my paraphernalia Sunday night. I don’t have any pipes or bongs anymore, so just the scissors, rollies, and weed box.

Days Sober 0
Days Stoned: 4

Entry #18 – December 2 2007
Optimistic to Stop Smoking Weed

Just checking in on Sunday night before I shut things down for the evening. I have had another good day today visiting friends and keeping them entertained. Being this busy is a natural mood lifter and because of this, I know that I can stop smoking weed!

I smoked again tonight. I gathered up the last of the bag that I had and smoked it once my company left a couple hours ago. It is hard to describe my current mood. I am disappointed about the relapses that I have faced in the previous week, but am also very optimistic about my ability to stop smoking weed. You’ll notice I put a days stoned counter on the bottom of the daily journal. This is another tool to help me keep on track.

I have noticed a huge difference in my behavior and efficiency when working on my journal in the past couple of days. A motivational behavior really kicks in when I smoke weed. Its almost like when I am stoned I slip into a passive, gathering information state, whereas when I am sober, I can gather AND disseminate information effectively. I would say I about twice as fast at blogging sober than stoned.

This week I am going to be writing about some relaxation techniques I have learned or practiced in the past. Releasing stress will be a priority this week and critical to my long term success.  I want to do acupuncture, just hope that medical will cover it.

I have no more pot left, and won’t be going to out much next week. See you Monday.

Days Sober 0
Days Stoned 5

I AM learning How to Quit Smoking Pot!

Journal Entry 19 – Dec 4, 2007
Cannabis Addiction Cravings – Day 13

Today started off a little slow, I am not a morning person, so morning didn’t come until about 11:00 AM today. I hate getting out of bed, but am happy to be up once I make the initial effort.

I didn’t smoke any weed today but I had two major cravings, both occurred under the same circumstances. Pretty much every time I come home, the first thing I do is pee, and the second thing I do is smoke weed. This can be a trip where I am away for a couple hours, or a couple days, the routine is always the same. Go home, and get high. Since I went out and was social today, I came home twice, and both times I really wanted to smoke badly. The first craving went away after about 5 minutes, and I am working through the second one right now. I had a great evening, I went out and had dinner with great friends, then as I was walking to my place, thought about how great the evening had been, and how much better it would be if I had something to smoke to ‘finish off the night’. These are thought processes that need to change and be replaced by something more productive.

This is the second marijuana smoking trend I have identified in myself, the first being smoking with friends I meet at the pub. So, I have to keep myself busy when I first get home and no hanging out at the pub for the rest of the week. I have a feeling my house will be very clean by Friday.

I did the deep breathing exercise 2x today, and did the moving meditation relaxation technique once as well. These both helped.

Days Sober: 2

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